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10 Practical Ways to Improve Feelings of Low Self Esteem

Feeling down on yourself happens to everyone. It's like sometimes your own brain just decides to be your harshest critic. But the good news is, there are practical things you can do to start feeling better about yourself. It’s not about becoming someone else, but about giving yourself a bit more kindness and recognizing your own worth. Let's look at some simple ways to improve feelings of low self esteem.

Key Takeaways

  • Challenge negative self-talk by questioning harsh thoughts and replacing them with kinder ones.
  • Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness you'd offer a friend.
  • Learn to say no to requests that overextend you to protect your time and energy.
  • Set small, achievable goals to build a sense of accomplishment and boost confidence.
  • Focus on positive relationships and surround yourself with people who uplift you.

Challenge Negative Self-Talk

We all have that little voice in our head, right? Sometimes it’s helpful, like a coach cheering you on. But other times, it can be a real downer, pointing out every little flaw or mistake. This is your inner critic, and it can really mess with your self-esteem.

When you catch yourself thinking something negative, like “I’m so bad at this,” or “No one likes me,” try to pause. Ask yourself if that thought is actually true. Would you say that to a friend who was struggling? Probably not. We’re usually much harder on ourselves than we are on others.

Here are a few ways to start talking back to that negative voice:

  • Notice the thought: Just become aware when you’re having a negative thought. Don’t judge it, just see it for what it is.
  • Question it: Is this thought 100% true? Is there any evidence against it? What’s a more balanced way to look at this?
  • Reframe it: Try to turn that negative thought into something more neutral or even positive. Instead of “I’m terrible at presentations,” try “Presentations are challenging for me, but I’m learning and improving.”

It’s not about pretending everything is perfect. It’s about being more realistic and fair to yourself. Think of it like this: negative thoughts are just thoughts, not facts. They don't define who you are.

This takes practice, for sure. But the more you challenge those unhelpful thoughts, the less power they’ll have over you. You’ll start to build a more positive and realistic view of yourself, and that’s a big win for your self-esteem.

Practice Self-Compassion

Think about how you talk to your friends when they mess up or are having a rough time. You’re probably kind, understanding, and encouraging, right? Well, it’s time to turn that same gentle energy inward. When you make a mistake or feel like you’re not measuring up, try to treat yourself with the same grace you’d offer a loved one. Everyone stumbles; it’s part of being human. Instead of beating yourself up, see these moments as chances to learn and grow.

Here’s a simple way to start:

  • Pause when you notice self-criticism. Just stop for a second.
  • Ask yourself: "What would I say to a friend right now?" Really consider the words you’d use.
  • Say those kind words to yourself. It might feel a little awkward at first, but stick with it.

It’s about acknowledging that things can be tough, but you’ve got this. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough. Being kind to yourself isn't a luxury; it's a necessary part of feeling good about who you are.

Learn To Say No

It’s easy to get caught in the trap of saying “yes” to everything and everyone. You might think it’s the polite thing to do, or maybe you’re worried about disappointing people. But honestly, constantly agreeing when you don’t have the time or energy can really wear you down. It’s like trying to carry too many groceries at once – eventually, something’s going to drop.

Learning to say “no” isn’t about being mean or unhelpful. It’s about respecting your own limits and valuing your time. When you overcommit, you risk feeling stressed, resentful, and totally drained. That’s definitely not good for your self-esteem. Saying no is a way of saying yes to yourself and your well-being.

Here’s how to get started:

  • Pause before you answer: Don't feel pressured to give an immediate yes. Take a moment to check in with yourself. Do you genuinely have the capacity for this?
  • Be clear and direct: You don't need a long, elaborate excuse. A simple, polite “No, I can’t right now” is perfectly fine.
  • Offer an alternative (if you want): If you can’t do something but want to help, you could suggest another time or a different way you might be able to contribute. For example, “I can’t help with that project this week, but I could offer some ideas next Monday.”

Remember, setting boundaries is a skill, and like any skill, it gets easier with practice. Each time you say no to something that doesn’t serve you, you’re building a stronger sense of self-respect.

Set Small Goals

Person celebrating reaching the top of a small hill.

Feeling overwhelmed is a big part of low self-esteem, right? Like you're staring up at this giant mountain and have no idea how to even start climbing. Well, the trick is to break that mountain down into tiny, manageable hills. Setting small, achievable goals is like giving yourself little wins throughout the day.

Think about it. Instead of saying, "I'm going to get my life together," which is way too big, try something like, "I'll tidy one corner of my room today." Or maybe, "I'll go for a 10-minute walk after lunch." These aren't huge feats, but they are things you can actually do. And when you do them, you prove to yourself that you can accomplish things. It's a really effective way to build momentum and show yourself you're capable.

Here’s a simple way to approach it:

  1. Identify a task: What's something, anything, you've been putting off or want to achieve?
  2. Break it down: What's the absolute smallest first step you can take?
  3. Do that one step: Focus only on completing that tiny action.
  4. Acknowledge it: Give yourself a little nod of approval. You did it!

This process helps you build a habit of self-efficacy. Each small success, no matter how minor it seems, chips away at that feeling of being incapable. It’s about creating a positive feedback loop where accomplishment breeds more accomplishment. You're essentially training your brain to see yourself as someone who gets things done, which is a huge boost for your confidence. For more on how to set yourself up for success, check out this guide on effective goal setting.

Seriously, don't underestimate the power of these little victories. They add up faster than you think and can really change how you see yourself and your abilities.

Learn Something New

Stepping outside your usual routine and picking up a new skill or hobby can be a fantastic way to boost your confidence. It’s not about becoming an instant expert, but about the process of learning and growing. Think about something you’ve always been curious about – maybe it’s learning a few phrases in a new language, trying your hand at pottery, or even figuring out how to play a simple song on the guitar. The act of tackling something unfamiliar and making progress, no matter how small, really shows you what you're capable of.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

  • Pick up a creative hobby: Try drawing, painting, writing, or even digital art. You don't need fancy supplies to start; a simple notebook and pen can be enough.
  • Learn a practical skill: Think about basic car maintenance, simple cooking techniques, or even how to knit. These skills can be surprisingly rewarding.
  • Explore a new subject: Read a book or watch a documentary about a topic that sparks your interest, whether it's history, astronomy, or psychology.

Remember, the goal isn't perfection. It's about the journey and discovering new facets of yourself. Every little bit of knowledge or skill you gain is a win that builds on itself, proving that you can indeed learn and achieve. This can really help you believe in your capacity to achieve and contribute, validating your own sense of self-worth [c9bc].

Trying something new can feel a bit daunting at first, and that's totally normal. You might stumble, make mistakes, or feel a little awkward. But that's all part of the learning curve! Instead of getting down on yourself, try to see these moments as opportunities to learn and adjust your approach. It's about the effort and the willingness to try, not about getting it perfect on the first go.

Focus On Positive Relationships

It's easy to get caught up in our own heads, especially when self-esteem is a bit shaky. But who we spend our time with really matters. Think about it: do your friends lift you up, or do they tend to bring you down? Spending time with people who genuinely support you and make you feel good about yourself can make a huge difference. These are the folks who celebrate your wins, offer a listening ear when things get tough, and remind you of your good qualities without you even having to ask.

It's not about cutting people out, but more about being mindful of your social circle. Try to lean into connections that feel energizing and positive. Maybe it's a friend who always has a funny story, or a family member who gives the best advice.

Sometimes, just being around people who accept you for who you are can be a powerful antidote to negative self-talk. It’s like a little boost of confidence just by association.

Consider these points:

  • Seek out people who are encouraging: Look for friends who are genuinely happy for your successes and offer constructive support when you stumble.
  • Spend time with those who share your values: Connecting with people who have similar outlooks on life can create a stronger sense of belonging and understanding.
  • Limit time with energy drainers: If certain relationships consistently leave you feeling worse about yourself, it’s okay to create some distance. You deserve relationships that nourish you.

Remember, nurturing positive relationships is a form of self-care. It’s about building a support system that helps you see your own worth. You can find great communities online too, like those focused on shared interests or experiences, which can be a fantastic way to connect with supportive people like those on Mind's Side by Side.

Surrounding yourself with good vibes from good people is a simple yet effective way to feel better about yourself.

Be Kind To Yourself

Think about how you talk to your friends when they're having a rough time. You're probably supportive, understanding, and gentle, right? Well, it's time to turn that same kindness inward. We often get caught up in being our own harshest critic, replaying mistakes or focusing on perceived flaws. But honestly, that's not helping anyone, least of all you.

Treating yourself with kindness isn't about letting yourself off the hook; it's about acknowledging that you're human and that making mistakes is part of the deal. It's about recognizing that you deserve the same compassion you'd readily give to someone you care about. When you mess up, instead of beating yourself up, try to see it as a learning opportunity. What can you take away from this? How can you move forward differently next time?

Here are a few ways to start practicing this today:

  • Acknowledge your feelings: Don't push away difficult emotions. Allow yourself to feel them without judgment. It's okay to feel sad, frustrated, or disappointed.
  • Practice self-care: This isn't just about bubble baths (though those are nice!). It's about doing things that genuinely nourish your mind and body. Maybe it's getting enough sleep, eating food that makes you feel good, or spending time in nature.
  • Celebrate small wins: Did you get out of bed when it was tough? Did you finish a task you'd been putting off? Give yourself credit for these things. They matter.

Remember, you're doing your best with what you have. That's always enough. Be patient with yourself as you learn and grow.

Give Yourself A Challenge

Feeling stuck or like you're not making progress? One awesome way to boost your self-esteem is by intentionally giving yourself a challenge. It doesn't have to be something huge or scary. Think of it as a way to prove to yourself that you're capable of more than you might think.

When you step outside your usual routine and tackle something new, you're actively building your confidence. It's like a workout for your self-belief! Start small, maybe with something you've been curious about but haven't tried. This could be anything from learning a few phrases in a new language to trying a different route on your daily walk.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

  • Master a simple recipe: Pick a dish you've never made before and follow the instructions. The satisfaction of creating something delicious is a real confidence builder.
  • Learn a basic skill: Maybe it's how to change a tire, knit a simple scarf, or use a new software feature at work. There are tons of free tutorials online for almost anything.
  • Take on a small creative project: Write a short story, paint a picture, or even just rearrange a room in your house. The act of creation itself is empowering.

The key is to pick something that feels just a little bit out of reach, but still doable. Each time you accomplish a small challenge, you're adding another brick to the foundation of your self-esteem. It’s about showing yourself that you can learn, adapt, and succeed, which is a powerful antidote to those nagging doubts. You might even discover a new talent or passion along the way! For more on building a positive self-image, check out these positive practices.

Remember, it's not about perfection; it's about the effort and the growth. You've got this!

Surround Yourself With Positivity

You know, they say you're kind of the average of the people you hang out with the most. It’s a pretty wild thought, right? If you’re feeling a bit down on yourself, it really helps to look at who’s in your corner. Are they the folks who lift you up, who cheer you on when you do something cool, or are they the ones who always seem to find something wrong or bring the mood down?

It’s worth taking a peek at your social circle. Think about it:

  • Who makes you feel genuinely good after you talk to them?
  • Who encourages you to try new things, even if they’re a little scary?
  • Who listens without judgment when you’re having a rough time?

Try to spend more time with those people. It’s not about cutting anyone out completely, but more about shifting your energy. Invest more time in the friendships that feel like sunshine and less time with those who feel like a constant drizzle.

Sometimes, just being around people who believe in you, even when you don’t quite believe in yourself yet, can make a huge difference. It’s like getting a little boost of confidence just by osmosis.

It’s amazing how much your environment can impact how you feel. If you’ve got people around you who are always pointing out the good stuff and celebrating your wins, even the tiny ones, it can really start to change your own perspective. You start to see yourself a little brighter, too.

Talk To Someone You Trust

Person talking to a trusted friend, sharing feelings.

It can feel tough when you're going through a rough patch, and sometimes, keeping it all inside just makes things feel heavier. Sharing your feelings with someone you trust can make a huge difference. Think of it like this: you wouldn't try to fix a leaky faucet all by yourself if you didn't know how, right? Talking to a friend, family member, or even a professional is like calling in a plumber for your emotional well-being.

When you open up, you get a chance to see things from a different angle. Someone else might offer a perspective you hadn't considered, or simply listening can help you process your own thoughts. It's not about finding someone to solve all your problems, but rather to have a supportive ear.

Here are a few ideas on how to approach this:

  • Choose someone who listens well. Not everyone is a great listener, so pick someone you know will give you their full attention.
  • Be clear about what you need. You can say something like, "I'm feeling a bit down and just need to vent," or "Could you help me brainstorm some solutions?"
  • It's okay if it's not someone you know well. If you don't feel comfortable talking to people you know, there are resources available. You can reach out to helplines where trained individuals are ready to listen anonymously.

Sometimes, just saying things out loud can help you realize that your negative thoughts aren't the whole story. It's a way to get a reality check and remember that you're not alone in your struggles.

Remember, reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness. It’s a proactive step towards feeling better and building up your confidence. If you're looking for ways to start these conversations, checking out resources on how to check in with friends can offer some helpful starting points.

Keep Going, You've Got This!

So, there you have it – ten ways to start feeling better about yourself. It might seem like a lot, but remember, you don't have to do everything at once. Pick one or two things that feel doable and start there. Building up your self-esteem is a journey, not a race. Be patient with yourself, celebrate the small wins, and know that you're totally capable of creating a more positive outlook. Keep practicing these tips, and you'll likely see a real difference over time. You've got this!

Frequently Asked Questions

What is negative self-talk and how can I stop it?

Negative self-talk is like having a mean voice in your head that tells you you're not good enough or that you'll fail. To stop it, try to catch these thoughts when they happen. Ask yourself if they're really true, or if you'd say them to a friend. Then, try to replace them with kinder, more realistic thoughts. It's like training your brain to be more supportive.

How can I be more self-compassionate?

Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you'd give to a good friend, especially when you make a mistake or feel down. Instead of beating yourself up, acknowledge that everyone messes up sometimes. Think about what you'd say to a friend in your situation and try to say that to yourself.

Why is it important to learn to say ‘no'?

Saying ‘yes' to everything can leave you feeling overwhelmed, tired, and even resentful. Learning to say ‘no' politely when you can't or don't want to do something is a way of respecting your own time and energy. It helps you avoid burnout and makes sure you have time for things that are important to you.

How do small goals help with low self-esteem?

Setting small, achievable goals makes things feel less scary and gives you a sense of accomplishment when you reach them. Each little success builds your confidence and shows you that you can do things. It's like climbing a ladder one step at a time, and each step makes you feel stronger.

How can focusing on positive relationships improve my self-esteem?

Spending time with people who uplift you, believe in you, and make you feel good about yourself can make a big difference. Try to connect with friends or family who are supportive and positive. If some people tend to bring you down, it's okay to spend less time with them.

What does it mean to ‘challenge negative thinking'?

Challenging negative thinking means questioning those bad thoughts you have about yourself. When you think something like, ‘I'm terrible at this,' ask yourself if that's really true. Is there another way to look at the situation? It's about finding more balanced and fair ways to see things, rather than just accepting the negative thoughts as facts.